Where did that Irie feeling go mon?

I admit it. I’m writing this hiding in my office praying for ten minutes to de-spaz.  Just a few days ago I was calm, relaxed, totally irie mon. Now, I’m shooting fire out my nostrils and forcing myself to stop and breathe. This is how busy life was before I left and it seemed okay, what’s up with the short fuse now?

My mother in law ran away when we returned from the airport. A few quick updates, you know – oops crashed the van, some issues at school and my youngest turned out to be wilder than previously imagined and then “okay see you!”, she was out. I somehow managed not to froth or be upset in any way, I understand what she was juggling at the age of almost 74. I am 39 and I get tired and want to run ha ha! Besides, I don’t like the van and am now hoping it’s close enough to total the thing. C’mon new car!

This week, albeit two days in only, has me firing off fireballs over everything. Un-eaten lunches, toilets with gifts left quite some time prior, toothpaste gobs in the sink – all have me smoking. It’s like I was never irie at all mon, which has me completely pissed off!

OH MY LORD…all the Lords actually, someone swoop in and paint me a different picture. I don’t like all this work right now. What was I thinking? I also received confirmation I am registered for the early date to attempt certification for a program I am a candidate within and it’s eight weeks away. HAVEN’T TOUCHED the material. For some reason I thought unicorns and rainbows would be waiting for me when I returned from the turning 40/overdue honeymoon/ ten years together as a couple retreat. The signals got crossed, I can’t find a unicorn and there’s no sun to make any rainbows. Where is the Caribbean Sea? What happened to the steel drums? White sand???
unicorns

Maybe that’s why I am pissy – seven days of sun followed by two days of darkness and freezingness ( even the tank less hot water tank froze – WTH?) has me pissy and blowing smoke.

Whatever it is, whatever the cause my timing is (ahem as per usual when I think these thoughts) off. I had thought I’d quit wine for a while post booze-indulgent vacation. So not going to happen, in fact I should probably stop writing and go fire my hubby a “LCBO” text. He knows what that code means……

Anyone else suffering post vacation blues / reality is sucking / where oh where is the sun blues?

Jamaica mon, one love.

It finally happened. Almost nine years later, we went on our honeymoon. It took forever to get here and then in a blink of an eye BLAM – it was over.  Just to make sure I knew it was indeed over Mother Nature blew extra cold air all over my somewhat tanned (I am one who is blessed with super pale skin that goes red, light brown and immediately back to ultra white) face and smacked reality back into me! It worked – message received.

It’s funny how time changes perspectives on honeymoons.  Throughout our time at the Riu in Ocho Rios we witnessed a few beach side weddings. We looked at couples with their lovey eyes and big smiles as they started this next chapter in their lives. We imagined what they would be thinking – possibly “what will their lives be like” together and what not. We know now what is and so there isn’t that magical feeling of what could be, it’s more like we took this time to look at what has happened. Holy cow it’s almost nine years of marriage and ten years together as a couple. It’s amazing how much happens without you really stopping to acknowledge all of it! And so that’s kind of what happened. We had a chance to pause and look at all that has happened and see how it has shaped us as a couple.

I know Dave is amazing. I knew this long before we boarded the plane. We have had several ups and downs and always come out together. From the loss of our baby girl Marie to the celebration of three live births as parents we have experienced so much. We’ve renovated a house doing much of the work ourselves and in many ways worked to build the life we have now, together.  Knowing this and how we act together to help each other I know we will take on all that remains yet to come as a team.

I also know that we need to do more of this, taking breaks and pausing to see and celebrate all that we have accomplished together. You don’t need a beach get away to do this, you just need to create the space and time. We haven’t been doing this enough. The beach was a great place to just empty our brains, delete all responsibilities and just have fun together. We did just that. Swimming, snorkelling, laughing, lots and lots of pina colada “do nothing” moments lounging alongside the beautiful waters…. It was in a word, Irie. Ok two words, it was “Irie mon”.
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It’s time to start putting nickels in the piggy bank and seeing how fast they can add up to another escape. Next time the kiddos will be with us, which is how it is and it will be fun. It’s just not light and carefree – if you travel with kids you too know this reality!! For now, our one escape as grown ups free in this world has come to an end. The memories, however, will definitely last forever.

Would I visit Jamaica again? Absolutely.  It is a little piece of heaven on earth……

One love mon,

Reeeespect.

 

Vino…..

I was standing in the school yard the other morning yapping with a friend whose children attend the same school.  Somehow or another we got talking wine.

It makes me smile when I think of how many conversations I’ve had lately wherein wine came up. We start off talking like we are modest consumers…and then somehow a few minutes later we are both confessing to multiple bottle experiences on multiple occasions per week. 

I’ve lied to every Doctor I have about the volume of vino I consume. When I confess to 7-10 glasses per week they are mortified and review how women absorb and react to alcohol differently than men and thus I am to proceed with extreme caution. Yet regardless of the warnings and/or my bodies own physical revolt to my behavior…it continues. I really, really enjoy it.

I work by day and many times night (coaching practice is growing YAY), parent by evening and then once the lunches are made, kiddos are asleep, toys tidied, laundry folded (and maybe on a really, really good day put away the same day)…I plop my butt on the couch. Directly beside me, my partner in crime AKA my husband. He is a custom cabinet maker by day and usually is unable to even take ten minutes as a break or space to himself upon arrival home. He’s the victim of absence. I work from home. They see me. He works at the shop….they miss him. He walks in the door and BLAM….like flies on flypaper.  For me it is absolutely awesome and I count down the minutes until he arrives. I smile, ask about his day and know full well I will likely never hear the full response as the kids are already attacking him.  It’s our little routine and it completely works for me….the calm before the dinner storm. 

Some days the wine opens at five. Oh who am I kidding, most days there’s wine at 5.  That’s when I am preparing dinner with three children hanging off me….picking at what I am preparing. Some days openly whining while I prepare it about their displeasure with my selection or a want for something I don’t have in the house. Like Salmon. I really dislike fish.  I can’t cook it. The smell puts me right over the edge and then I can’t eat it. It has to be BBQ’d to keep the cooking of fish smell out of the house….. 

I know some will be reading this thinking OMG She is a total alcoholic. By their standards I guess I am. What makes me feel better about it is that I’m totally not alone. I’m really quite normal by comparison to those around me. They are good people!! So am I…. besides…when I use my big goblets…it’s just a glass a day…….

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via Google

Blind to the obvious…

Once a summer, in July, my hubby and I receive a “pass”.  It’s an over night babysitting gig via my hubby’s mother. We are not in the habit of rejecting this type of generosity as once you have a third child, babysitter’s disappear.

July is both my husband’s, as well as, my birthday month. It’s also our wedding anniversary. It’s the perfect reason to leave over night, that’s for sure!

I will say, my mother in law was awesome. She arrived at 8am Saturday morning and told Dave and I to take off.  We were out within twenty minutes.  I don’t recall showering at that speed in a long time but I was really impressed with our ability to exit quickly and fully prepared!  We had not yet packed before she arrived. Really an amazing accomplishment, I was very proud of us.

Our check in time was 3pm. It was 8:30am. It was a gorgeous summer day. The sun was shining, the humidity was non existent.  It was hot, cloudless and gorgeous.

After first having stuffed our faces in at a local breakfast place, we opted to hop on a boat and head over to Toronto Island.

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Toronto, ON

I have not been to the Island in years. Many, many years. I was a kid.

It is so beautiful there.  Dave and I loved the boat ride over.  We were kid-less and so the mission was to hit a patio and have a beer immediately. It was just past 11am.

We arrived and immediately claimed the last of the waterside tables.  We sat here for a few hours enjoying pints and sharing some food.  It was fantastic. I miss this grown up time. Where you can just sit back and not worry about washroom trips, who peed their pants, why is the baby screaming, why aren’t they eating and what not.

We didn’t have to drive. We had no time lines or schedules to adhere to.  For the first time in ages, this was just “us” time with no agenda.

That first stop at the restaurant pretty much set the tone for the day.

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My handsome hubby waterside on the patio….

We wandered around the island, soaking in what we both forgot existed within our little universe. After returning via boat to the city we just wandered around the water front. Again reminded of what’s been right in front of us the entire time.

It was absolutely gorgeous. The day was awesome. Pints on different patio’s. We ate well. We met up with friends and then spent our evening alone together.  The Royal York hotel was great (location is amazing for wandering around).

Not only did I re-discover Toronto, I was reminded of how much fun it is just hanging out with Dave.  We enjoy each other. We like spending time with each other.  Get away’s like this allow you to really, really have fun with one another. We were only away for just over 24 hours and I feel so very full right now.  We’ve been smiling all week.

Or maybe our bodies just don’t know how to respond to actually sleeping.  One passes out quite heavily post many pints a’wanderin’ the town!!

I was really impressed though with our ability to plan ahead.

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First time ever having breakfast delivered to the room. Ridiculous amount of money for a bran muffin and fruit BUT worth every penny for the carafe of coffee!

Not only did we sleep in ( just past 8am!! MIRACLE. Can’t believe we made it that late!),  but we didn’t have to feed people. They fed us. Amazing.

I’ve got so many ideas on how to spend time with the kiddos now that we’ve seen all that we have. Family bike rides on the water front. Ferry rides, family bikes ( 4 ppl bikes) and picnics on the island.  I love how inexpensive these ideas are AND that they remind us all that has been in front of us the entire time.

There’s so much more than the hustle and bustle available to us.

I will also say of myself this past weekend, I ate well. Really well. We found locations with organic chicken breasts and salads…I felt so well.

Beer and salad. Yum.

This love of mine…

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The date stamp is wrong…never did figure out how to fix it on that camera ha ha!

‎7 years ago around this time in July while at a friend ‘s wedding this pic was taken. We were caught up in ourselves in this moment and had no idea the photographer was up to something. Moments later the woman in the corner of this pic and her partner approached Dave and I and stated that she could feel how in love with each other we were and how lucky we were to have found that in each other. SO I thought she was probably faced and friendly but now I suspect she was a coach ( as one I am now aware of the awareness one has when tuned in to other people deeply and as the Bride and Groom are both coaches surrounded by coaches). As our 7 year anniversary approaches I am more in love with my hubby than ever. I am so fortunate to have discovered what could be if only we allow ourselves to be. I don’t know what compelled me to share this in this moment, but if you are sitting on the fence about something or running from your own fears – don’t. When you truly allow yourself to be and allow others in – amazing things can happen. I am truly blessed. ♥ Don’t tell him I said nice things. I may have to take it all back if he becomes irritating with a big head later……

Le Pumped!

There is just something so magical about how incredible you feel post awesome workout.

I had 35 minutes to myself this morning and I utilized every moment of it to the max.  I feel like a million bucks right now!

My intent was twofold. One; to workout – legs to be specific. Two: to get a grip.

We learned recently that my husband has skin cancer.  He is at the beginning of this journey.  I am a total realist and am thankful it’s not worse, however, his father passed from cancer which began the same as my hubby’s now is and my uncle just past a few months ago after his struggle. You can’t help but to go off the emotional deep end whenever the Big C is discussed and/or applied to you or a loved one!

That said, post work out I’ve got a good feeling about everything.  As Mr. Bob Marley sings – every little thing is going to be alright!

So what was today’s workout? How can you pull it off in thirty minutes? ( warm up was five minutes on treadmill). GO HARD.

All variations had three sets in each – 12 – 15 reps for sets 1 and 3, 8-10 reps for set two which is my heaviest weight for that exercise

Leg press: Three variations – all are about differentiated by the positioning of your feet – targets different areas.  Hit a personal best thus far today – pressed 180 lbs! Aiming for 300 lbs.

Hack Squat: Three variations – again toe point changes targeted area. New personal best today – was able to pump out 8 reps with 45 lbs/side. SO AWESOME.

Hamstring Curl: until failure – as heavy as I can – heaviest today was 80 lbs.

Last but NOT least, deadlifts with 25 lbs / side on long bar.

This routine was followed up by my Vega shake.

There is nothing like a morning workout to get you fired up for your day 🙂

It’s time to throw myself in the shower and take the hubby to see the next Dr to begin treatment.

It doesn’t matter what’s happening in life if you have a positive outlook!

What is your favorite workout? How do you maximize on your time?

Wishing you a wonderful day.

Be well,

Nic

The chaos that is me, at present…

Where do I begin in terms of summarizing this past week.

Workouts- My goal is 3-5 workouts per week. I pulled off 2 last week.  Better than nothing but still not as targeted.  It was a frustrating week.

Postpartum cycle number two was beyond hideous. I felt like an awkward teenager most of the week.  For some reason my cycle generated mass amounts of gurgling sounds which are not easily masked in the workplace. People asking if I was hungry etc. all the while it’s just mother nature talking to me via my period.  I destroyed a pair of pants and salvaged two others after the most maximum amount of coverage “Always” could provide me failed to stop the leakage (in the workplace no less!). Apparently my wings weren’t working for me! I don’t even usually use those ones, I’m anti chemicals. But desperate times call for absorbent products! Thankfully, it’s almost over. I’m now open and willing to accept menopause if this is the way my cycle intends to continue. Chin hairs are better than leaking and gurgling every month!  I’m 37 for crying out loud!! Isn’t this supposed to diminish vs cause embarrassment in public? I’d apologize to my male readers if my bitchiness wasn’t so high right now.  I’m stressed, allow me to continue….

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via google

Now that the grossness that was my monthly has almost concluded I’m itching to get back in the gym. Current challenge: scheduling.

My plan was to get into the gym this week three times. That hasn’t worked out.

Sometimes you are sidetracked by what’s happening on the home front. This is one of those times.  It’s crazy how things can change in an instant and suddenly all you can do is figure out how you are going to get through what it is that’s unfolding.

So either I become a raging alcoholic, or I get my butt back in the gym. I’m going tomorrow morning come hell or high water. I’m nearing complete overload and I need to get in some me time even if only for an hour.

I need to get my stress out and I do that in my workouts. Tomorrow morning is leg day. There’s nothing like leg press and squats to eliminate stress. I am really, really, REALLY looking forward to it.

I was so in need of a physical release today that while on breaks while producing a training session ( I am in virtual training land) I was doing push ups, plank, burpies and crunches on my ball. That’s the upside of virtual anything – you have no idea what’s really happening behind the scenes on the other end ha ha.  It made me feel better and kept me feeling very positive in my day regardless of the chaos that it currently is.

What do you do in your time of stress to release it?

Have you ever worked out at your desk?

Be well,

Nic

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